Join Us!

Joining the Arachnophiles is easy! There are four levels of membership, each with progressively more stringent entrance requirements.
  1. Initiation
  2. Egg
  3. Hatchling
  4. Spinner

Initiation

To begin weaving the web of your Arachnophilia, write in 25 words or fewer exactly what it is you like most about spiders. E-mail your answer to our webmaster, Taran Tula, and he will get back to you within 26 hours to let you know if you're a member. While our entrance requirements are strict, no one has been refused membership in our almost 50 years of existence.

Egg

As an Egg, you have achieved the first level of membership. You receive the "I Wove Webs!" button, and may enter the on-line chat room to discuss our little furry legged friends. To advance to the next level, you will be required to photograph all of the corners in your house to show that there is a healthy spider living near the ceiling (mom will like this part, because it's a great way to control household pests!).

Hatchling

Hatchlings may wear the very classy Black Widow t-shirt with the glow-in-the-dark fangs. Hatchlings participate in local spider conventions and lobby the government to crack down on the indiscriminate decimation of the nation's spiders by sloppy and uncaring exterminators.

Spinner

Spinners are at the highest echelon of Arachnophile strata. The Spinners are selected by invitation only, and are the only members permitted to wear the ceremonial octagonal hat and leg warmers. The exact duties of the Spinner are on a "need to know" basis. There are many fringe benefits given to Spinners, including frequent fly-eater miles.